BPD Episode: What It’s Like + Reaction 4 Years Later (Video)

What Does a BPD Episode Feel Like?

In the video below, I read my first ever blog post on BPD Beautiful. The post is from 2019 and it detailed what a BPD episode looked like for me at the time, which was the start of my BPD recovery journey. I also provide a present day (in 2023) reaction.

For back story, I’ve been in therapy since 2011 but I wasn’t diagnosed with borderline personality disorder until 2019. I launched BPD Beautiful soon after my diagnosis to document my recovery & treatment. I was fortunate to have the option of joining a DBT group (which was a miracle in and of itself – thank God, because the therapy practice I was in soon stopped offering it and at the time, there were no other affordable DBT options for me). The group lasted 9 months and I made practicing the DBT skills a daily part of my life. DBT was life changing. By 2021, I was in remission from BPD.

Times have surely changed since writing the post I read in this video. At the time of writing this (in 2024 – a year after recording the video), I can’t remember the last time I had a full blown BPD episode. Regardless, I still remember how they felt. In a nutshell, they absolutely sucked. They were dreadful, demoralizing and all consuming. I wouldn’t wish borderline personality disorder on my worst enemy. I continued building BPD Beautiful even after getting to remission to try and inspire those with BPD to get themselves to a healthier place and reach their full potential. Because no one deserves the mental hell borderline personality disorder causes.

If you’re dealing with BPD episodes, BPD splitting and intense emotions – don’t give up on yourself. I’ve updated the original post to include a few tactics and information for people living with BPD and for loved ones to better understand BPD. I sincerely hope they help you.

Read the original blog post here.

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